Lady Bug has been abused in the past and has some fear aggression problems, but she’s very loving for all that. We’re pals, and I really enjoy my early afternoons with her.

Our typical visit goes like this:

Lady: [lunging, but full of fear] barkbarkbarkBARKbarkbarkbarkBARKgrrrrrrwl! (trans. please don’t kill me)
Me: [giving her a hand to sniff] Hi Lady Bug! Hey there posey! You know me. Wanna go for your WALK?
Lady: [licks my hand]
Me: good GIRL!
Lady: [looks up at me, a little less scared now]
Me: let’s get your stuff. You want the pink collar or the red one?
Lady: [endures silly question patiently, knows treat may be involved]
Me: pink it is!
Lady: [wags tail a little, knows treat may be involved]

Off we go, through her quiet neighborhood, to the huge soccer field of a nearby school. She loves it there and for a few moments her eyes will grow shiny with excitement as she romps and plays and, I hope, forgets whatever it was that’s made her so very scared of the world.
(more…)

Writing is really hard for me right now. Which is bad. Bad for you because you don’t get updates in any sort of timely fashion. Very bad for me because I’m staring at a WRITING TEST which I must complete by Monday in order to test out of my school program’s writing course.

But the words and sentences and pictures they make will not come. They’re all stuck in a cloud of second-guesses and self-doubt and lack of motivation. The last one isn’t completely my fault - my assigned topic is methamphetamines, which, when you think about it, is really ironic. But it’s not interesting to me, and I’m staring to fear it. At least I can spell it now. That took a while.

Something has happened to me this summer. I’m all slow and fudgy. I feel like my mind, my words, are wading through a sea of muck, possibly made up of dog poop.

Don’t get me wrong: I like the dogs. A lot. But my brain is just…gone. No wait, it’s here. I think.

Anyone have some meth?